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Old is when…

“OLD” IS WHEN….. Your sweetie says, “Let’s go upstairs and make love,” and you answer, “Honey, I can’t do both!”
“OLD” IS WHEN….. Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you’re barefoot.
“OLD” IS WHEN….. A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
“OLD” IS WHEN….. Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
“OLD” IS WHEN….. You don’t care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don’t have to go along.
“OLD” IS WHEN….. When you are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
“OLD” IS WHEN….. “Getting a little action” means I don’t need to take any fiber today.
“OLD” IS WHEN….. “Getting lucky” means you find your car in the parking lot.
“OLD” IS WHEN….. An “all-nighter” means not getting up to pee.




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Bob and Brenda worked in the supermarket. They weren't check-out clerks. And they weren't stock-boys. Brenda sure wasn't. And they weren't employees who worked in the fish section or the deli. No. They were on the shelves.

They hadn't been on the shelves very long but in that short time they'd developed a considerably close friendship.

The chatted all day when the store was busy and at night when the store was closed. They talked about everything. The talked about what raw products they came from. The talked about their manufacturing processes. And they talked about the long routes in semi-trailers that brought them to this store.

Oddly enough the one thing they never made clear to one another was just what product each of them was.

One day when Brenda was commenting on their friendship she told Bob she was grateful for their amity. "Are you Tea?" said Bob, pekoe-ing her way. "I thought I was Tea". You're coffee!"

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