Tuesday, 30 June 2009

The HBDC Virtual Tour Stops in Ottawa (2)

Welcome back to the second day of our tour of the capital of Canada, Ottawa. I've lived here for well over 40 years, so I know many of the highlights (and lowlifes) of both Ottawa and Gatineau. For example, when I was much younger I would cross the border to haunt some of the late night bars with other lowlifes on the Quebec side of the border in what, prior to amalgamation, was once known as Hull. Then they razed the bars and built office towers in which I worked in as an adult! Such is progress. For both the landscape and me!

The Ottawa region is truly one of the most beautiful places on earth. The canal, bike paths and greenbelt (a ring of undeveloped land around the city) add to the natural majesty of the region. Museums, art galleries, world-class restaurants, an NHL team, the National Arts Center and blues, jazz and folk festivals provide just some of the options for entertainment.

In the region, there’s something for every season. In the spring it’s a magnificent display of tulips along the parkway next to the canal. Our tulip tradition started when the Dutch government gave Ottawa 100,000 tulip bulbs after the Second World War as thanks for offering safe haven to their exiled royal family. The Dutch didn't give us Canada geese but we have lots of those too!

In the summer, there are the ruins and gardens at Mackenzie King estates near Chelsea, Quebec. William Lyon Mackenzie King, Canada’s 10th prime minister, had a passion for architecture and gathered a collection of picturesque ruins from across Canada and abroad. He bequeathed his estate to the nation when he died. Mackenzie King was also highly eccentric and had another passion: communing with spirits, including those of Leonardo da Vinci, Sir Wilfred Laurier, his dead mother and several of his Irish Terrier dogs, all named Pat. Hard to imagine that this guy was Canada’s longest serving prime minister, not to mention the longest serving leader in the British Commonwealth. When they say he had a thing for spirits one wonders if they came from another world or a another bottle.

And in the fall, there’s the turning leaves in Gatineau Park, or a picturesque covered bridge in nearby Wakefield, Quebec.

There’s something else that Canada’s capital is famous for. Something that isn’t widely known. It’s the home of the Elvis Sighting Society. It's members apparently believe Elvis is still alive and lives in the cottage community of Tweed about 90 miles west of Ottawa. The Society resides at Moe Atallah’s Newport Restaurant in the city's west end. The Society is actually a charitable organization helping the less fortunate across the city. But the Newport is filled with Elvis photos and memorabilia and if you want a great “greasy spoon" breakfast - and for under $5 - the Newport is the place to go. In recognition of the Society and the Newport, the small lane behind the restaurant has been officially dubbed "Elvis Lives Lane" by Ottawa City Council. I think Moe missed a perfect opportunity in not naming his restaurant “A Hunka Hunka Burning Stove”!

And so concludes our little glimpse of where I live. And as we wave bye, bye to Bytown I leave you with this observation. It's unfortunate Mackenzie King died when he did. He would have loved being a member of the Elvis Sighting Society!

July 1 & 2 the HBDC virtual road trip hits Maine where Debbie Does Drivel has been waiting patiently to show you all around. Who knows, maybe she'll spring for some lobster ayuh!

Monday, 29 June 2009

The HBDC Virtual Road Trip Stops In Ottawa

Welcome to the latest stop on the Humor Bloggers Dot Com virtual road trip. It’s been a long haul getting here, beginning almost a month ago in the city we Canadians all love to hate – Toronto. Or, as the locals there say “Trawnta”. Check out the right-hand column over there to see where the tour has traveled thus far. and then, sit back, put your feet up. And for the next little while enjoy the sights associated with the jewel of our nation, its capital.
The National Capital Region includes Ottawa, Ontario - Canada’s capital - and neighbouring Gatineau on the Quebec side of the Ottawa River. I live in western Gatineau in a community known as Aylmer, a stone’s throw from Parliament Hill, the seat of government. They call it the seat of government after the asses that run our country. And as for throwing stones, I’ve tried but the rocks I heave always fall short. But I digress.

Aylmer is a microcosm of our nation where Francophones (60%) and Anglophones (40%) live in peace and harmony and in two languages. During the day Aylmer is a quiet, sleepy, bedroom community of the region best known for its network of bike paths, its many golf courses and its picturesque marina.

But at night the Anglophone population triples as young Ontarians pour across the border to imbibe until the bars and strip clubs close at 3 am. Or at least they sure did when I was young and living in Ontario.

The region was first populated by the Algonquin First Nation. Indeed, they’ve recently submitted a land claim to the federal government for the rights to the Ottawa River watershed. Good luck with that! When the Europeans happened on the scene in the early 1800s they turned the Gatineau and Ottawa Rivers into a booming timber transportation network, so Ottawa was initially a lumber town. In the 1830s Colonel John By and thousands of French Canadians and Irish immigrants completed the Rideau Canal – a secure water network from Kingston, Ontario to Montreal, Quebec which avoided the St. Lawrence Seaway and proximity to the Americans. The city where he settled was first called Bytown. Now just the Byward Market bears his name. Steps from Parliament Hill, the Market excels at local produce and trendy restaurants, bars and nightclubs.

The Canal the Colonel built is now known as the World’s Largest Skating Rink. Winnipeg, Manitoba - not content to be known for Portage and Main, the coldest intersection in the world - stole our title of “longest” skating rink last year, one we’d held since 1971. Now we call it the "largest" skating rink in the world 'cause ours is wider than Winnipeg's.

In 1857, Queen Victoria named Ottawa Canada’s capital after which Ottawa’s chief industry was forever changed to the manufacturing of red tape. In modern day, the federal bureaucracy has a run for its money with the hi-tech industry as the region’s largest employer. So much so, the region has been nicknamed “silicon valley north.” (Gee I didn’t realize Ottawa played a role in the development of breast implants.)

And on that point (pun intended) we'll take a break and resume our little tour of the Ottawa area tomorrow. Highlights include a tale of 2 Kings: a paranormal Prime Minister and the royalty of rock! Come on back, eh?

Sunday, 28 June 2009

Sunday Funnies

*Note: Due to a technical glitch this post should have posted June 28th. Sorry for the inconvenience.

In a bit of a departure, this week Sunday Funnies takes a look at how the editorial cartoonists, over the years, treated the self-proclaimed King of Pop, Michael Jackson. Here's a bit of a different retrospective of Jackson, who died Thursday at the age of 50.

Friday, 26 June 2009

The Dangling Conversation

There's a debate underway in my household between my wife and I. I say "underway" because it hasn't quite reached the "raging" stage. If you want raging, my wife (a Francophone) and I (an Anglophone) from time to time (usually in a weak moment of my own making) slip into our number one discussion around why we don't speak more French at home - ergo - when am I, a former public servant who learned French at the expense of our gracious taxpayers and was technically rated bilingual (even though I hardly used it), going to improve my use of Canada's other language? This one never gets resolved, hence it's ongoing nature.

But the current debate is over a remark I casually made the other day. I'm no geek, but with a lot of time on my hands I surf the web, converse on Facebook and such and - I have to admit - "I'm nonamedufus and I'm a Twitterholic". In an epiphany-like moment I was struck by the apparent impact of social networking technology on our everyday lives and I said something to the effect that "Gee, do you ever stop and think that technology now defines us generationally more than age does?"

My point was that social networking technology crosses all ages from tweens to the blue rinse set. And, if you think about it, it kind of started with things like radio, followed by television, then colour television, the Internet, e-mails, Facebook and now Twitter. These things weren't confined to one age group but used by all.

The number of seniors who use Facebook, for example, continues to grow. Hell, they even have their own groups. The two I joined are called "I am too old for Facebook - But I Don't Care" and "Unlike 99.9% of the Facebook population, I was born in the 50s". But while Facebook wasn't invented by or intended for Senior Citizens, nevertheless its users cross all generations.

Now my wife's position in this discussion (notice I avoided the term "argument') is not contrary to mine. Rather it's tangential. (Now, you know why our arguments are ongoing - nobody ever remembers the original premise!) Her position is that social networking technology is really anti-social networking technology. Why? The advent of e-mail MySpace, Facebook, Twittering and texting has discouraged face-to-face discussion, chiefly, in addition to a deterioration of our youth's spelling abilities as they "txt" to their "bff"s and in many instances replaces accuracy with opinion.

All good points, with which I hasten to agree. But slightly off the mark from the original premise.

I think I'll e-mail her and let her know!

Thursday, 25 June 2009

Gone Fishin'

I'm off for the wilds of near Northern Ontario for the next little while to get in a little fishin'. It's our annual trip to Lake Temagami and hopefully more than the mosquitos are biting. In the meantime, through the magic of post-dated articles, I've left a few humourous morsels for you. In particular, tune in Monday and Tuesday June 29th and 30th as the Humour Blogger Dot Com Virtual Tour rolls into Ottawa and I get to guide you around our nation's capital region. Mounties and tulips and politicians - oh my! In the meantime, Happy Canada Day and for my American friends Happy July 4th and I'll see you in a week or so.

Wednesday, 24 June 2009

When Celebrities Go Bad

The social networking phenomenon known as Twitter has its good side and bad side. The good side has been evident over the last several weeks as a social networking platform few know about has become basically the only way for protesting Iranians to let the rest of the world know just what is going on in their country - a country where the state has taken control of every other technology.

The dark side? That's exposed everytime celebrities tweet. Now remember twittering is limited by 140 characters of text. In the hands of many celebrities that's 140 characters too many!

We've all heard of Ashton Kutcher - Mr. Demi Moore - and his over one million followers. I admit I'm one of them but for the life of me following @aplusk is like watching Star Trek, where no intelligent life form exists.

Then there's Oprah. Just her name generates followers both on and off Twitter. An assistant periodically provides vapid comments in Oprah's name.

Shaq, the friendly giant basketballer tweets and on a daily basis demonstrates hus sub par IQ and illiteracy. Shudda stayed in school big guy.

GaryJBusey purports to be Gary Busey but his tweets are actually funny. Here's a couple...

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

Without nipples, breasts would be pointless

It's rumoured Jennifer Aniston broke up with John Mayer because he basically has a Twitter addiction. He is a prolific tweeter. Here's one of his...

I've been thinking about time travel a lot lately. You have "when" and "where". The when moves through the where, which stays still.

John's been working nights in the studio on a new album. Get some sleep John.

One of the most obnoxious celebrity tweeters is Kirstie Alley. Last week she sent roughly 40 tweets in an hour documenting her workout, or what she termed her "Tworkout". Isn't that cute? No wonder she has problems keeping followers...

who is up late for late chat with crazy bitch

YAY...FINALLY GET TO TALK TO YOU...WHEW..CRAZY FUN DAY...i missed you all so much...my new GIANT family..not like MANSON...lol
Dwight Howard is an all star basketball player who plays for the Orlando Magic. The Magic lost the championship in 5 games to the LA Lakers. What's on Howard's mind these days?

ok i wanna go on snl any ideas lol on wut i should do. or yall tell me some skits for my website

Petermansbdridge purports to be the well known Canadian broadcaster who delivers the nightly news on the CBC's The National. In reality it's some smart alec having him on. Here's one of his tweets from last week...

Looks like (he) made it! RT @scroll "happy birthday to Barry Manilow!"

If nothing else many of these tweets are entertaining. And whether you laugh with these celebrities or at them at least you laugh. But having followed these twits for some time now I can best sum up their impact by paraphrasing Mark Twain:

It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool, than to tweet and remove all doubt.

Monday, 22 June 2009

US and Them #8

People are still talking about the Kung Fu-like reflexes President Obama displayed last week when, in the midst of a television interview, he delivered a fatal blow to a frisky fly. I for one admire the guy. The incident reminded me of a childhood reaction of mine and my buddies to annoying flies. We used to try and catch the buzzing buggers in our hands, shake our clenched fists and then watch them try to fly away with often times hilarious results. The trick to this is to actually catch the fly first and I never could. When I saw the video of Obama I yelled, “He da man, he da man!
I mean, how cool is that. The supreme leader of the free world has ninja-like moves that put Chuck Norris to shame. Right on. But the President’s predatory prowess didn’t sit well with everyone. PETA, those putzes for the ethical treatment of animals, condemned the President. In a news release they said:

“We support compassion even for the most curious, smallest and least sympathetic animals,” PETA spokesman Bruce Friedrich said. “We believe that people, where they can be compassionate, should be, for all animals.”

To push their point they sent him something called a “Katcha Bug Humane Bug Catcher”. I tell you his moves sure wouldn’t have the same impact if Obama had to stop mid-way through the interview with an “Oh, excuse me, I have to set my bug catcher trap”.

What’s up with PETA? What have they got against Obama for killing a fly? His predecessor, after all, tortured humans and we didn’t hear from them then.

And Canadians must be high on their watch list. Hell, we swat mosquitoes like they’re going out of style, in the hopes that they’ll soon go out of style.

Here in Canada, our Prime Minister doesn’t quite have the moves, or the approval rating, of the American President. In fact he’s gone in a totally different direction. On the Prime Minister’s web site, Stephen Harper promotes every week the adoption of stray pets.
This week’s lol cat is a 6 year-old neutered male named, wait for it, "Mr Lovebug". You can bet Harper won’t be swatting that “bug”!

Sunday, 21 June 2009

Sunday Funnies/Happy Father's Day

There were several issues that caught the imagination of Canadian editorial cartoonists this week. The Iranian election, the game of chicken between the minority-governing Conservatives and the Opposition Liberals over the possibility of a Canadian summer election, and the travails of RIM co-founder Jim Basillie in his attempts to bring the Phoenix Coyotes to Hamilton, Ontario...

And it's Father's Day. If my Dad were alive he'd appreciate this. I inherited his warped sense of humour. Happy Father's Day, Dad.

On Being a Father...
Red Buttons
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.

Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then, fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.

Ernest Hemingway
To be a successful father, there's one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don't look at it for the first two years.

Saturday, 20 June 2009

Dancin' Fool

In the mid 60s "Freak Out", a double album, snuck onto the charts. It was the debut of Frank Zappa and The Mothers of Invention. The band has gone through considerable changes throughout the years and included such muscians as jazz violinist Jean-Luc Ponty and singers Mark Volman and Howard Kaylan from the Turtles who used the stage names "The Phlorescent Leech and Eddie". Dancin Fool is from yet another incarnation of the Mothers and off 1979's Sheik Yerbouti . The song is Zappa's commentary on the-then disco scene

Dont know much about dancin
Thats why I got this song
One of my legs is shorter than the other
and both my feets too long
course now right along with em
I got no natural rhythm
But I go dancin every night
Hopin one day I might get it right
Im a dancin fool, Im aDancin fool
I hear that beat;
I jump outa my seat,
But I can't compete,
cause Im aDancin fool, Im aDancin fool
The disco folks all dressed up
Like theys fit to kill
I walk on in and see em there
Gonna give them all a thrill
When they see me comin
They all steps aside
They has a fit while I commit
My social suicide,
Im aDancin fool, Im aDancin fool
The beat goes on
And Im so wrong
The beat goes on
And Im so wrong
The beat goes on
and Im so wrong
The beat goes on and Im so wrong
The beat goes on
and Im so wrong
I may be totally wrong,
but Im aDancin fool,
Im aDancin fool
Youwsa, youwsa, youwsaI got it all together now
With my very own disco clothes, hey!
My shirts half open, to show you my chains
and the spoon for up my nose
I am really somethin
Thats what you'd probly say
So smoke your little smoke
Drink your little drink
While I dance the night away,
Im aDancin fool, Im aDancin fool, (etc., etc.)
I may be totally wrong,
but Im a
I may be totally wrong, but Im a
I may be totally wrong, but Im a
Hey darlin...can I buy ya a drink?
Lookin for mister goodbar?
here he is...
Wait a minute...Ive got it...youre an italian!
Hah? Yer jewish?
Love your nails...you must be a libra...
Your place or mine?

Friday, 19 June 2009

The Muffin Man, the Muffin Man

If you were asked to caption this picture, what the hell would you say? Well, Chica over at
Lady Sarcasm (visit her blog; she's hilarious!) posed that question earlier this week.

I thought and I thought of what the heck I could come up with. I think my first attempt was along the lines of "Bob swore he'd never drop acid at Disneyland again". And guess what? It went over like a lead balloon. But I prevailed and it was my second attempt that vaulted me past all the other bloggers and into FIRST place!

"Gary's wish had come true. He really and truly was a stud muffin now."
And looky, looky at what I won: the coveted Kickass Captioner award! This is one of thee most distinguished awards in all of the interwebs. I shall display it with pride! Thanks, Chica.
This is my second award this week. Maybe I should buy a lottery ticket!

Little Bit O' Soul

Garage rockin' one-hit wonders Music Explosion issued a great song in 1967 and quickly faded from sight. While, branded one of the early bubblegum musical groups, A Little Bit O' Soul was a catchy tune that hit #2 on the Billboard Hot 100 and earned Music Explosion a gold record. Highlights of this lip-synced performance include the drum-kit and the invisible organist...

Note to readers/listeners
This is the last 60s music post on nonamedufus. Tomorrow will be the final 70s post. But don't fear, I've created a music blog, accessible from the sidebar on this page called dufusdownbeat where I've moved all the musical content to.
dufusdownbeat is where you'll find my 60s and 70s weekly features as well as articles and clips from artists celebrating birthdays and other milestones and links to interesting music sites.
While humour and music remain my passions, I've merely decided to hive one off from the other and make each blog cleaner and more focused. I hope you enjoy the changes. And I hope you'll visit both sites. Thanks.

Thursday, 18 June 2009

Poop Power

In this age of high gasoline prices and oil shortages one's mind often turns to a.s.e. - alternative sources of energy. In particular, we often hear the phrase "go green". But in this story a.s.e may well stand for ass source of energy. Read on to see how one community plans to "go brown".

In Manchester England they're tooting, make that touting, toilet power as the fuel of the future where the city's loos will help contribute to local gas supplies. Hey, mi gasa es tu gasa!

Two companies - United Utilities Group and National Grid - plan to turn a by-product of the wastewater treatment plant at Davyhulme in Manchester, northwest England into gas for the local gas network and fuel for a fleet of sludge tankers.

The companies have come up with one of the all-time greatest euphamisms for their product. In lieu of "shit" they're calling it "biomethane". Gee, next time I want to get out of doing the dinner dishes I'll say "Sorry, honey, I've just gotta run and pass some biomethane".

The companies are optimistic they'll be able to produce enough gas for about 500 homes by 2011. Hell, in college my buddies and I could produce that amount of gas just after several hours at the pub! Geez, my ex sister-in-law could heat her home all winter just by eating brussel sprouts once a week!

While the initiative is revolutionary, for some it may give new meaning to the phrase "waste not want not".

Having worked so hard to supply the raw materials, I wonder if Manchester's home-made gas suppliers will get a discount on their gas bills for their efforts.

Wednesday, 17 June 2009

Your Humble Award-Winning Braggart, er, ah, Blogger

I won another one. Yep. My blogging buds the Dyer Boys have bestowed upon me their prestigious "Twinsy". Who are the Dyer Boys?

As the boys, themselves, like to say on their blog: Philip (L) and Douglas (R) are self-described as "the funniest pair to come out of Louisiana since Britney Spears".

And here's my award:

This is the photo the boys ran:

And this was my line that they judged as "the least crappy caption" (way to build up a guy's confidence fellas!)

"Okay, we found the car. Has anyone seen 38 clowns?"

Thanks, Dyer Boys! The runners-up, or crappier captions, can be found here.

Tuesday, 16 June 2009

US and Them #7

There are few issues more controversial in Canada and around the world than the annual seal hunt that takes place in the waters and on the ice floes off Atlantic Canada.

The bloody images, the heated rhetoric, the impassioned defences all combine in a familiar rite that pits governments and sealers against animal rights groups.

So begins an article on CBC.ca . For years now the Canadian seal hunt has pissed off people around the world - including attention-seeking pop-star Paul McCartney and his ex-wife, the one-legged model (she said she was anti-sealing, but she didn't have a leg to stand on) - and groups from PETA (Putzes for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) to Greenpeace to the European Union.
Every year as seal hunters prepare for their annual cull, Canadians – known worldwide as those polite “eh” saying apologists - take a deep breath and don’t exhale until the seal hunt season is over. Why? They’re waiting for the latest global reaction that craps on Canada as a bunch of barbaric monsters. What once were exotic exports, some might say seal pelts have become the product of purloined perfidy. (Some, maybe, but I guess not many would put it in so many words.)

But not so fast Dudley Do-right. If you think the seal hunt is the epitome of egregious eradication and extinction (lots of Es, eh?) then you haven’t heard about the wild-goose chase, literally, going on in New York City.

It seems Mayor Bloomberg has a mad-on for mallards and has authorized the slaughter of all Canadian geese within a five mile radius of JFK and La Guardia airports. And you thought the seal hunt was a senseless slaughter? Federal Agricultural employees are expected to round up something in the area of 2,000 Canada geese and exterminate them using carbon monoxide. Yep, that’s right, the geese will be taken to a so-called “euthanasia center”, likely Mayor Bloomberg’s running limousine in the city hall garage. What? Isn’t that the most common method of death by carbon monoxide?

I don’t know what the feds intend to do with the carcasses, but unlike seal meat the geese won’t be used for human consumption. Hey, what about the homeless. They’ve gotta eat too!

Of course, the reason for the wild-goose chase is because migratory Canada geese have been blamed for the Jan. 15 downing of US Airways Flight 1549, which ditched in the Hudson River. Unluckily for the geese, geese feathers were found in the jet’s engines

As a Canadian who has suffered the rhetorical slings and arrows associated with the annual seal hunt it’s nice to see Americans getting a similar drubbing over, of all things, geese round-ups. But the round-ups (nice spin – sounds better than “bird kill”) aren’t the only approach. The city plans to post signs banning bird feeding in parks, and the Port Authority is expanding shotgun training of airport employees. Just what we need: surly airport employees with shotguns, trained to shoot to kill bird feeders!
You know, some might think this story to be a canard (ha, ha) but it is neither false nor about ducks. But it does remind me of the expression “It’s hard to fly like an eagle, when you keep getting sucked into a jet engine”!

Monday, 15 June 2009

Canada - Fewer Twits Per Square Mile

Hey, Yanks, don't go calling Canadians a bunch of twits. You know not of what you speak.

There are times I think I spend too much time on the computer. I spend considerable time on this blog, at HumorBloggers.com and reading the blogs of friends and cyber-colleagues as well as managing my Facebook page, listening to blip.fm, watching You Tube videos, sending and receiving e-mails, and sending and receiving "tweets" or Twittering.

Now I find Twitter kind of cool. You can follow colleagues, sports figues like NBA star Shaq, movie stars like Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore and Kevin Spacey, recording artists such as John Mayer and Weird Al and late night talk-show hosts like Jimmy Fallon. You can even follow the musings, er, ah, tweets of...
Seems, however, that in the Twitter universe, at least, I'm a minority.

The Globe and Mail newspaper reported last week on the findings of a recent survey by the polling firm Ipsos Reid. They found that 1 in 100 Canadians use Twitter.

Moreover, said the Globe, the study polled 824 Canadian adults online and found that while 26 per cent of respondents are aware of Twitter, only 6 per cent of them had "actually spent some time coming up with witty 140-character messages". (Yeah, and if you ask me, considerably less than 2 per cent actually succeed in demonstrating how witty they are!) Astoundingly, this figure translates into about 1 per cent of the Canadian population. Amazing.

Now 824 people isn't much of a sample size. Nevertheless the survey would seem to portray the majority of Canadians as a bunch of techno-pesants. Six per cent of those polled had actually used Twitter? What provincial backwater, hole-in-the-wall are these people from? Have they been living under a rock? Don't they watch TV, read newspapers, browse the interwebs?

Say what? They have lives? Oh, never mind.

Sunday, 14 June 2009

The Sunday Funnies

Well, the pickings were plentiful for Canadian editorial cartoonists last week. Natural Resources Minister Lisa Raitt, not content to leave secret documents behind in a TV studio felt her 15 minutes of fame needed to be extended and commented into a mistakenly recording tape recorder that the shortage of medical isotopes to help treat cancer patients was a "sexy issue" that would look good on her if she solved it. The same aide who lost the documents also lost the tape recorder that a reporter finally listened to after it sat in his office for 5 months. Gable of the Globe and Mail had some fun with this issue.
The fall out over North Korea's nuclear missile continued. The Ottawa Citizen's CAM had a unique perspective of the impact on the USA. CAM also had some fun with the hockey playoffs coming to a close.
We end the week with two portrayals of federal Transport and Infrastructure Minister John Baird. Somewhat of a pit bull at the best of times, Baird was overheard to say that
since the city of Toronto couldn't get its one application for funding under the $4 billion federal infrastructure program right, and was now "bitching" about a lack of co-operation from Ottawa, Toronto could "fuck off." Dewar of the Toronto Sun and Aislin of the Montreal Gazette must have thought they'd died and gone to heaven with such material to work with.

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