Saturday, 30 November 2013

Pause Ponder and Poulet

I think if Marv Albert were providing a caption this week all he would have said was "Yessss!"

Or Dick Vitale would have dedescribed this as "a dipsy-doo Dunk-a-roo".


But, alas, I guess good old Marv and Dick had better things to do.

So instead, let's look at our Honourable Mentions.

I'll never surrender my bucket of KFC extra crispy, all beaks and feet.
Agent 54

A little to the left, Lower. Lower.
Oh yeah. THAT's the spot baby…
LOBO

Both excellent captions, guys but look who's hanging out with dufus this week…

LaToya went up for the block, but Cassandra came through with a 3-piece bucket.
Screaming Me-Me

Way to go Me-Me. This week you get to hang out with dufus. I hope you don't mind if we take a pass (no pun intended) on basketball and catch some football instead. It's okay. The NFL has it's share of birds: the Ravens, the Cardinals, the Seahawks, the Eagles and the Falcons.

Yum. Sounds much more interesting than KFC.

And here's your noname badge to commemorate this momentous occasion.


Marv, what do you think of Me-Me's win?


Thanks to all for playing. See you next week. Same time, same blog.

Wednesday, 27 November 2013

Pause Ponder and Pun #156


Yeah.

I don't know about this.

I hope you do.

Mmm. KFC.

That picture has me dribbling.

Leave me a caption or two in the comments.

Come back Saturday for the results.

Oh, and if you're looking for something to do to waste your time between now and then, while you're fowling out (see what I did there my American friends?) break away to Screaming MeMe's "Caption This".  

Monday, 25 November 2013

Displacement Activity


So here I am with time on my hands. I'm waiting for my iPad battery to recharge so I can get back to the latest "Jack Reacher" novel I'm reading, Without Fail. It's great to order e-books. They're cheaper and delivery is immediate. The downside is you're at the mercy of your iPad battery.

So my choices to fill the time - or as I like to call it: displacement activity - were either solitaire on my laptop or write a post. I'm tired of solitaire - which I keep losing - so the blog wins out.

I was up with the birds this morning, taking my car to the dealership to install the winter tires, do an oil change, check the brake fluid level and look at the muffler which was getting kind of noisy.

So I'm sitting in the waiting room, reading my iPad book and BAM - or BLING, I guess - the power went out. So looking at my car took longer than I expected due to the lack of power. And, of course, I used up more of my iPad battery which I'd brought along to pass the time.

Finally, about 3 hours later - as opposed to an hour to hour-and-a-half - the car is ready. And there's good news and bad news.

Isn't there always?

The good news is the bill for changing the tires, the oil change and the brake fluid was all of $95. Well, gee, sitting through that power outage was actually worth it.

Ah, not so fast dufus. The bad news is the muffler needs replacing. I don't speak garageese, you see. As the problem was explained to me I kinda heard a voice like that of how the adults sound on the animated Peanuts TV show:

...mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah
 at least $500 mwah mwah mwah…

But they don't have one on hand and have to order it.

Great. I get to go back next week where the only displacement activity will take place in my wallet.

Saturday, 23 November 2013

Pause Ponder and Pop

Well it's Saturday and time to take a look at who said what about this week's pic. Remember our lovely ladies?



I think I may have scared off a few would-be captioners with my interpretation:

Mel B just never knew there'd be a Spice Girls reunion.

But I didn't scare everyone off.

For example here are a couple of HMs (Honourable Mentions. Get with the program, eh.)


One of these drinks is not like the others.
Linda Medrano


The battle of the sodas were out fizzed this year by newcomer 
and former Biggest Loser contestant Lola the Big Cola.
Screaming MeMe


But our winner is a newlywed from Montreal who, for some reason, saw fit to bare his soul to us this week…


I've been known to take a Coca-Cola or Fanta to bed, and maybe even a Pepsi. 
But the last time I took a Big Cola to bed I was up all night.
Shawn @ Stubborn Fool


Well, good for you Shawn. I guess that box of Viagra came through for you, eh? Congratulations, though, you be hangin' with the dufus this week. And I refuse to ask you "How's it hangin' eh?" I think we already have a good idea.

Here's your badge you old smoothie you.


Hey, make sure you join us next Wednesday for another edition of Pause Ponder and Pun. Like the lottery people keep telling me, "You gotta be in it to win it!"

Wednesday, 20 November 2013

Pause Ponder and Pun #155


Mel B just never knew there'd ever be a Spice Girls reunion.

I just love having first crack at some of these pictures.

But now it's your turn.

Leave as many captions as you like.

The more the merrier.

I don't know what kind of captions you're going to leave.

Why don't you tell me what you want, what you really, really want.



If you had fun here, then get yourself over to Screaming MeMe's for more crazy captioning.  

Saturday, 16 November 2013

Pause Ponder and Pasture Prime

Okay, it's Saturday and time for this week's results. Here's our pic…


All the cattle are standing' like statues
All the cattle are standing' like statues
They don't turn their heads as they see me ride by
But a little brown maverick is winking' her eye

Well if that's the case it's gonna be a beautiful morning.

Sorry I got carried away there. And that's no bull.

Okay, okay, here's our honourable mentions:

A little hard of hearing, Amy Sue thought her friends said, 
"Amy Sue, you should date a cow, boy!"


…and then she said "Baaaaaaaaa!" Yeah, well she's really a blond.


Pretty good, huh? Yeah, I thought so too.

But our winner knows me too well and went after my peculiar penchant for pithy puns.

No matter how udderly ridiculous she looked, 
Daisy Mae couldn't help milking it for the camera.
She was just bull-headed like that.

Woot, woot Nicky! (What the hell does that really mean anyway? And do people still say that?) You may be pasture prime but the dufus will still let you hang with him.

What do you say we meet in Hawksbury and take a stroll in the meadow. I hear the corn there is as high as an elephant's eye. We can gaze into each other's eyes and get lost in the husks…or the tusks…until the sky turns to dusk and you tell me how much you like my musk. Or not. It's up to you.

Oh, here's your stinking badge…



It's yours… no, no take it.



Yeah, whatever Cheese Lady. Congratulations anyway.

See y'all next week.

Thursday, 14 November 2013

Can You Hear Me Now?


Well, truth be told, I'm three for three. My memory went a long time ago. Now my hearing and sight are caching up.

Earlier this week I was fitted for hearing aids. Expensive? You bet your bippy. There were about 8 models to choose from. They still have the ones with the big blob of plastic that hangs over the back of your ear. I passed on the model in favour of the one that's totally inconspicuous as it's crammed half-way down your eustachian tube.

This development is going to benefit two people: me…and Mrs D. You see Mrs D has been yelling at me for several years. It had nothing to do with the state of our marriage but instead the state of my hearing.

And she hasn't been too pleased when we watch TV because I have to crank the volume up to some ungodly level that's so loud it practically makes her deaf.

Anyway, in two weeks I'll be sporting my new ears and once more we'll be living in harmony.

On to my sight. I wear glasses. Have for about 15 years now. Lately though things have been going out of focus. In fact I can see better without my glasses…although not that much better.

Anyway, a trip to the optometrist followed a trip to a specialist confirmed I need cataract surgery. Have you ever looked into how cataract surgery is done?! Like the last thing I need is some guy poking around in my eyes.

The left eye's going to be done in mid-Januray. The right one several weeks later.

Mrs D, trying to make me feel a little more positive about all this, has taken to calling me the $6 million dollar man.


And given what I'm paying for hearing aids and eye surgery, she's not too far off.

Wednesday, 13 November 2013

Pause Ponder and Pun #154



Sex with a cow? I wouldn't put it pasture.

Hee, hee, I couldn't resist.

I hope you can't either.

Leave a caption in the comments.

I hope we get a real "range" of captions this week.

Come back Saturday and see what the "udders" have come up with.


Now, head on over to Screaming MeMe's place for that udder caption contest!

Saturday, 9 November 2013

Pause Ponder and Paper or Plastic

You guys are amazing. What a great crop of captions we had this week. Let's get right down to business.

Here's our pic...



And here's our honourable mentions…

I couldn't help myself -- they had such a good deal on fresh kids at the supermarket today!

At the checkout, Marge chose the appropriate bag when asked "paper or plastic?"

And I thought the stork brought them.

But our winner's caption this week you might say was picture perfect…

Anne Geddes fired her biographer for releasing one of her early
 'whimsical baby' photos to the tabloids.

Congratulations, there, Cheryl. You be hangin' with noname this week!

What say we ditch the kid with a view to seeing what develops. I don't mean to be negative but I have no plans in particular. Maybe if we hang out long enough something might come into focus. What do you say?

Oh, don't forget your blog badge…


And thanks to everyone who participated for playing along this week.

We'll see you Wednesday for another edition of Pause Ponder and Pun.

Wednesday, 6 November 2013

Pause Ponder and Pun #153


I'm not gonna say a thing.

I'm gonna leave it to you to come up with an appropriate caption.

Leave it in the comments.

We'll see you Saturday with the results.

I can't wait.

In the meantime drop by Screaming MeMe's place for her weekly caption contest.

Tuesday, 5 November 2013

Bibliofile - October


Well, here we are in early November and time to take stock of last month's reading.  Let's see, we were at 85 books at the end of September. Add 7 more in October and that's, um, carry the four and…oh, yeah, 92 books this year with 2 months to go. Safe to say I'll likely pass 100. A far cry from the 30 I projected at the outset of the year.

I started out the month with Stephen King's latest, actually a sequel to The Shining, called Doctor Sleep. Typical King "edge of your seat" kind of novel. It doesn't quite compare to The Shining but I still loved it.

I read a couple of musical autobiographies. The first by the late Levon Helm. The second by Graham Nash. Fans of The Band and Crosby, Stills & Nash will enjoy these. I did. And of course my CD collection grew as I read each one.

I also read the first two books in the There Goes The Galaxy trilogy by blogging body Jenn Thorson. If you like science-fiction with a humouristic twist then these are for you. In spots I laughed out loud. Which is okay because I'm usually alone when I read during the daytime.

I have to mention an interesting book called The Girl by "the girl" at the centre of the Roman Polanski rape case. It was a fascinating read.

And I closed out the month with another sequel. This called Sycamore Row by John Grisham which follows up on the main character from 1989's A Time To Kill. Excellent read. Grisham for me is one of those "go to" authors that never disappoint. Like King, Lehane, Follett, Rankin, Archer and several others who's next book I always anticipate.

So here's the list for October...

Doctor Sleep - Stephen King
This Wheel's on Fire - Levon Helm
There Goes The Galaxy - Jenn Thorson
The Purloined Number - Jenn Thorson
The Girl - Samantha Geimer
Wild Tales - Graham Nash
Sycamore Row - John Grisham

A fairly eclectic collection, to be sure. What are you reading these days? Any recommendations?

Monday, 4 November 2013

Dona Nobis Pacem - Blog Blast For Peace


Today is Blog Blast for Peace Day. Bloggers all over the world are addressing this issue in various ways. It's a serious subject. The lack of peace in various parts of the world has led to strife, hunger,  suppression, persecution and even death. 

As we think about this today, I hope you won't mind if I inject a little humour into the proceedings. After all, this is a humour blog for the most part. Nevertheless the observance of today and it's key issue is very, very important. For now, though, I hope I at least make you smile...










To find out more about blogging for peace take a look here. Who knows, maybe you'll want to join in.
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